Couples Therapy

As an Expert Therapist, Ms. Pamela Hand, LCSW
can help you to address:

Your relationship was not supposed to be this way.

You’re not sure of how it got here, but your relationship is a long way from the way it used to be. You argue, fight, and say things you don’t mean…and sometimes you’re not even sure why. Even just small things can lead to so much drama and hurt feelings.

You might wonder if it will always be this tough, or if you and your partner will make it. And if so, how long? And how much more struggle can you really endure? Is it supposed to be this way or is love just a fleeting thing that has fell through your hands?

Neither of you want your relationship to end, but if it’s going to continue, it can’t continue like this.

There is hope for your relationship.

More than anything, you want you and your partner to be together as one. To be happy and whole together. To see one another like you used to in the beginning.

You want to:

  • Learn to just be together again, without the arguing, the stress, and the drama.
  • See one another’s perspective and really hear and be heard.
  • Give affection as an outpouring of love and romance, and regain intimacy with your partner.
  • Feel the freedom and authenticity that comes with just being with someone who makes you feel comfortable.
In Therapy, I will help you process the pains of your past, while looking into your future and planning for what you want that future to look like. We will work together to develop goals and the skills and processes to grow into the person you want to be, (the person you’re meant to be), and leave the hurts and hang-ups of a past that hasn’t benefitted you behind.

Our time together will be guided by your goals and your specific needs in each session, as will my response and utilization of therapeutic techniques. As you find improvements in your mood and overall stability, we will expect to see improved relationships, more confidence, a healthier outlook on life, and increased happiness day-to-day.

Often under the Anxiety and Depressive symptoms or problematic behaviors is unresolved Trauma.

It’s possible to regain the trust and sense of togetherness that once made your relationship great without losing who you are individually.

Each of you brought pain and a past into this relationship, and whether we want them to or not, the things we’ve experienced in life impact our thoughts and behaviors. We will work together to help each of you to have your needs met in healthy ways in the relationship and begin to understand one another through open, loving communication.

Betrayed Partner Therapy

This is designed as a safe space for anyone who has experienced the trauma of partner infidelity, pornography, emotional or physical relationship betrayal in their life. Trauma can be defined as a deeply distressing or disturbing experience. Being a Betrayed Partner is damaging in so many ways. When you seek Therapy for Betrayal it is important that you find a skilled trauma therapist to help you find your way through the devastating experience and emotions you are encountering. Being a betrayed partner is confusing. The betrayed partner often blames themselves or questions their part in their partners behaviors. In Therapy you will receive the best therapeutic approaches to help you heal trauma and help you reduce the distress caused by the betrayal.

Betrayed Partner Therapy assists individuals with:

  • Identifying the effects (overwhelming feelings of deep pain) they experience from being betrayed.
  • Untangling the emotional network of attachment to the betrayal.
  • Reduce or Resolve the disturbance associated with the betrayal.
  • Resolve the symptoms of depression, anxiety or other behaviors adapted to cope with the betrayal.
  • Take your Life Back and Improve the Quality of Your Life.

I will use evidence based approaches like the ones below to help you and your partner to develop the means by which you will repair your relationship:

Gottman Method Couples Therapy

The Gottman Method is an approach to couples therapy that includes a thorough assessment of the couple relationship and integrates research-based interventions based on the Sound Relationship House Theory.

Couples who enter into Gottman Method Couples Therapy begin with an assessment process that then informs the therapeutic framework and intervention.

Assessment

A conjoint session, followed by individual interviews with each partner are conducted. Couples complete questionnaires and then receive detailed feedback on their relationship.

Therapeutic Framework

The couple and therapist decide on the frequency and duration of the sessions.

Therapeutic Interventions

Interventions are designed to help couples strengthen their relationships in three primary areas: friendship, conflict management, and the creation of shared meaning. Couples learn to replace negative conflict patterns with positive interactions and to repair past hurts. Interventions designed to increase closeness and intimacy are used to improve friendship, deepen emotional connection, and create changes that enhance the couples’ shared goals. Relapse prevention is also addressed.

Goals and Principles of the Gottman Method

The goals of Gottman Method Couples Therapy are to disarm conflicting verbal communication, increase intimacy, respect, and affection, remove barriers that create a feeling of stagnancy in conflicting situations, and create a heightened sense of empathy and understanding within the context of the relationship.

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